Monday, April 28, 2008 @ 9:42 AM


如果你还爱我

我带着一颗疲惫的心走了
我知道自己在你心里已不重要
虽然我们曾经相聚过
也许对于你来说
已经没有什么值得回忆

我带着一颗沉重的心走了
我知道自己没有勇气道别离
虽然我们曾经拥有过
但是对于你来说
已经没有什么值得回忆

难道早已注定
不能真正拥有你
难道我真心付出一切
只为了承受孤单和寂寞
我知道你不敢对我表白
是不要看到我的伤怀
虽然你没有说要离开我
我已经感到你不再属于我

如果你还爱我
你不会对我如此的冷漠
又怎会让我在漫漫长夜独自徘徊

如果你还爱我
你不会对我如此的冷漠
我只能含着眼泪
默默地离开

bold those are really some words that describe my feelings. there are mani songgs tat i currently are in love with, but this song is just one that i will post. tooo tired out. gonna sleep at 1am. so coutning i have around 6hrs of rest? yea. yesterday less den 5hrs. so god dammn tired today. tml gonna be another long day. schooling from 9-4pm after that, gonna make a trip to commonwealth.. sianns. =.=! den after that maybe go bugis le.. i wanna get a Ipod Touch la. know why? cus a road idiot like me, needs to get past in singapore need a map. and and and, street directory died on me la! =.=! so pissed. i like cannot go aniwhere far on errand these few days. thanks ar streetdirectory.com . my life, all depends on u, and this is how u treat me?!!! *grrrs* hmmms. today is so so so tiring. learnt alot. can sae, ok ok lo. after school went to do my work with joel they all and after that, we went over to have dinner at this random indian place. it's alwas fun with them around. shall not elaborate. they can really bird talk. but i believe, there are mani more better than them. LOL.

went home and printed out lecture notes for tml's lecture. omfg. 139 slides. die. i print out only those with words . not the pictures! =.=. gonna kill me man. so total 70 slides? half leh! =.= . tml, duno how long lecture gonna be... there's alot to be done this week. and it's really killing me. jus the planning out alone, is enough to kill me. =.= . i shall go rest now. short and sweet.

nites people.

i promise i will forget, promise i will get on with life. promise never to cross into ur life. promise never to get upset over you again. promise not to think of the impossibles. i`ll just get on with life as usual. i alwas put on a smile in school, as i really find no one i can confide everything to. tiffany, thanks for the talk girl. it really made me realise alot, and able to heave a sigh of relief. thanks. * loves*

nites people.

xoxo



Sunday, April 27, 2008 @ 9:09 AM



this is maybe the defination of - love ;

hello hellos! finally a post with a picture. hmmms, went out today, feeling happy. hmmms. really apologise for the sad sad post. but i guess, readers will understand my innerself more urh? heeehs. aniwae, woke up at 11 despite sleeping at 4am in the morning. i wanna catch my drama show ma.. hmmms, dammn nice lo.. after tat i sat down infront of my computer and started to plan my hws and stuffs, and revised abit here and dere. conclusion, i love the sub, common skills, introduction to htm, macroeconomics. as for F&B fundamental annd research on hospitality and tourism, i will learn to love them. i do understand, but i dun have that deep love for them lehhs. lols. come love me more u both! LOL. heeeeeeehs.

den, went over to meet philbert for lunch from 5-6 plus since he ended his soccer and wanna meet me i shall do a good deed to meet him lo. thank me for keeping u company before u meet joel they all! lols. denn, shopped, bought my doggs food again. grr. they are sucking my money, my dog, my 8 hamsters, my younger sis. i mean, my younger sis have deep cravings for some stuffs, she will sometimes come to me. and of cus, to support myself. i must earn more money le la. bank left not much. i still have to pay for books and stuffs. argh. nvm. gonna receive pay on next fri and sat. heehs. hope i can save abit and spend abit of those la! i wanna save up man! hmmms, after meeting him, i headed over to bugis to meet alwin and his friend? coached him abit on math & english. plus gave him a treat as it was his birthday. yupps. ( wanna know black and white ar? promise to score well urh! den u will noe! heehs! ^^ ) hmmms, met him him from 7 - 8 plus . den headed over to work. work nothing much la.. lols. shall not mention it.

back home, watched ISWAK 2. last episode. tmd. so ... gan jiong, and den end the whole damn thing. idiot idiot idiot! so upsetting me cann?! i wanna go cryyy.. heeehs. okok i shall not cry. hohos. hmmms, lesson gonna start at 9 tml but i aint asleep yet and it's 1am now. i gotta wake up at 7.30am cus i realise i`m really a tortoise.. need to prepare this and this and that. =.=! bad girl ar joanne!

i received a bad news from amanda. her robooski hammy died 4 left 1. omg. so heartpain la.. nvm. i shall wait for the second litter to have 2 babies of that kind. heeehs.

okkay. i shall reply taggs now and hit my bed ! ^^ tagg more people. if not i fed up i dun blog or i close blog! hahhhhs. tagg la. so mani silent reader. surrender urself!

TAGS REPLY :

james : BOOON! HELLO! lols. waaa, u also silent reader. finally admit ar. i shall shoot u the next time i see u. heard from philbert u chheered when chelsea got in?! $#%# BOON! WE MAN U FAN LEH! HOW CAN BETRAY MAN U. SO SAD LOH! I GO CRY ! lols. take care ar. next time mus also win playing cards ar. lols.

naemah : heeehs. i`m feeling all those towards yooos! are you touched? i bet u are. why nva cry?! no la. i shall have another wish. naemah to be mine! lols. eeeyerr.

li yong : hello! lovedd tooo! heeehs. mus tag more ar. i will miss u de ar.. heeehs.

terrence : wah, not bad sia. got view my blog again. lols. tag more hor. and remember to remind me for lessons. heeehs. i have poor memory one lo. LOL. ^^


okkie dokie. bye byee!


xoxo



Saturday, April 26, 2008 @ 12:39 PM


sorry for the upsetting post previously. hmmms. i must be crazy for not sleeping at this time. sorry, but will go to sleep after this post. becus i saw some stuffs i got really upset and stuffs. i dunno. but seriously, at nights, i cannot cannot think. i must must have stuffs to keep me focus to do. if i ran out of things to do before i am tired, i will think about all those upsetting stuffs. bad habit of mine.

well, i hope i can really pick myself up from that last experience. i musnt dwell in that animore. i must understand. things wun go back to how it is . or rather, what i wish for. so joanne. wake up. yea. i will not think too much already. sorry readers.

xoxo



@ 9:52 AM


control control control .. *breatthe * relax....

ok.

went to kwang's house to help him install microsoft office into his com.i woke up early becus of you eh. hmmms, denn went over to tmall to get some stuffs. after that headed to amanda's house to wait for her. decided not to go down to novena HQ to report . next week den. we headed to eastpoint to shop. had a great talk with her in the bus. long time since we talked so much. denn, after she left, i met philbert, boon, joel at east point. fun to see them still so playful and stuffs. headed down to bugis after that. nothing much. work nothing much to sae i think.

ok. this comes the part to tell you guys why i have to breathe in to relax before i post for toay. i promise that i wont have any more sad post, but sorry, i today really really really have to get this off my chest...

seriously, i realise i really am still bothered with your actions, whether you still acknowledge my presence and all those... yoos know, i really do still think of you. it isnt easy to forget you. yes, it may be hurtful, but i still tried to contact u and stuffs. still, you are still avoiding me, acting ignorant. you know how deeply you hurt me? you may not bother, you may not care. i believe, i still stand a place in your heart. if not you wont purposely do all those just to avoid thinking back. how silly my mind was to dream of you last night. i don't know. it was such a great dream. but i know, it will nva come true. how much i wanna talk to you to tell you stuffs to clear things up. the chance was never given. it hurts to know you REALLY tried all waes to avoid me. i`m really tired of contacting u again and again and again. it may be irritating to you, but still, i tried my best. i tried. it's saddening to know this is the ending of what i call... love.. why carn friendship still stays after a relationship ends? i dunno wad's wrong with me.. i really dunno. i tried . i really tried. i`m tired. really tired of loving in the past. and i noe it's tiring to love someone, so i dun wish that you love too much.cus i dun have the confidence at all. i dun have.i`m afraid to hurt u. afraid to step into this afraid to end all this with the above ending. i`m really afraid. who knows how i feel aand who can i spill the whole thing out to? who can i sought? haiis.

helpless.

sorry for the above post. sorry. utterly sorry. i`ll reply tags tml. sorry.

xoxo



Friday, April 25, 2008 @ 8:44 AM


HAPPY NOT I NOW POST TERRENCE & SHIRLENE! lols. they are waiting for me to blog better thank me for blogging ar. LOL. heeehs. today, went to school at , 1.30pm. walked to school. heeehs. and reached around 2 pm quite punctual ar! hahhhhs. praise myself. so bhb.

today was really really great and , we spent the day having lectures, fire drill and playing and going for orientation. shall not elaborate much as i`m really tired now. i found my goal in life and i have plan out some stuffs for myself. i shall not mention anithing about it till i have establish it , den i`ll reveal. hope it will be soon. but ya, i gonna make use of it. cus, i really really, wanna give it a shot. yupp. so good luck people. i gtg. shall post tml alright? take care and lovees!

byee!

xoxo



Thursday, April 24, 2008 @ 8:57 AM



i really miss those times in the past ;



hellos, sorry for not posting yesterday. was extremely tired out. i don't know why too! maybe, it's time i took a good good rest ba.. seriousy tired out..


okayy. yesterday, i didnt have ani lectures or tutorial or lab. so it meant no need to go school. but being a good friend yesterday i went to school at 12 to meet the rest up for lunch. met them at 12.28pm. met bjorn, rambert, philbert. and philbert, bjorn have lectures at 1pm. !! so they left at 1pm. whilst rambert went to find his friends. so wentover to the mushroom, to wait for his friend before i head over to find amanda. his friends arrived i walked over the bridge saw amanda she came back already. =.=! so she asked me to do some errands for her. she left and next came jun liang to accompany me. LOL. didnt expected it la. and he peii me slackk. after that he left, marcus lee came to accompany me!


lols. i so fortunate la.. heeeehs. denn, met marcus lee, and he waited with me for bjorn.. after waited for bjorn we went over to AS canteen to wait for phil and li yong. wow, AS canteen is so cool la. LOL. aniwae, waited for li yong and phil already we decided to head to library to slack. went up to the 4th level , rent a DVD called "the ring" watched it before already la. it's gross! LOL. den after we finish watching it's already 5.45pm. went downstairs to wait for rambert, bjorn and edwin. dey arrived and we went over to tmall already la. such a big group walking together. so cute can. LOL. we were like tired out thanks to watching the ring suggested by marcus lee. =.=! hmmms, headed to tmall , watched streets king.NAEMAH JOINED US!heeehs. i kept blowing wind to her. so cooling right?! not bad la i would say, the vulgarity is really alot, and some scene is really really gross. no wonder NC 16. LOL. it was really really cold inside la! dennn denn denn, went to play the arcade for awhile! LOLS. the guys are funny la.=.= but i was at that time too cold and tired to continue playing. left and walked home after they played..


seriously, i was stunned by wad you said. i was stunned by ur reaction and stuffs. i hope to give u an ans soon, but please, yoos mus know, i really really dun have confidence in myself animore. and i carn be as good as i was before. and i know, you asked me to have confidence in you , but , i dun wish to hurt you. let me think about it alright. i`ll give u an ans sooon. i dun mean to hurt you or wad. but just, let me have time to think.


okkayy. i have blogged already.sorry arh, this post too monotonous. rushing to go school soon. LOL. there's HTM orientation today, shall bring my work to revise today whilst waiting for orientation to start. ^^


tags reply :


Naemah : o.o! i tod u love ben 10?! aw. i got it wrong. power ranger for u? heeehs. green , blue or red? heeehs for u to see ma. i noe u miss my cute face. so i put down dere. I SAW U TODAY!u saw me too! HAPPY?! LOL.


philemon : thanks for viewing. didnt know tat too. LOL. and yea, i shall try not to eat so late next time! thanks for telling.


bjorn : WANNA CRASH MY BLOG AR?! lols. it's okay. i love the music can already. LOL.


terrence : i know u love my blog song, unlike someone i mention above. HAHS. lols, see ya later!


okkay. i run off already ! ^^


xoxo



Wednesday, April 23, 2008 @ 10:16 AM


just a random photo i editted, 4e2-nians, you may kop this. heehs.


seriously i miss 4e2 alot la! gahhhhs. but glad that i am still hanging out with them often. yays! but not to forget, i love my class currently now. hohos. yupps. dun really like to see some stufffs but yea, hope we will stay as one class la.. hmmms. today was real tiring alright? but why i aint asleep yet? gosh. i don't know why either. went to school at 11.40am reached at around 11.55am? quite long today.. slowly took my time to walk i think. heeehs. reached and started lecture for research for hospitality and tourism.

omg. this subject is a killer man. goshh. so so so glad that i didnt fal asleep and paid attention la. it did helps.initially i really dunno what the hell the lecturer was saying. but to the end, sort of understand le ba. thank god.

went for a 2hr break. lols. went to find edwin but to no avail. found abby , yasmin, nisa. saw rambert, kenneth, and more people that i noe la. heeehs. and slaccked with the malay girls for awhile before i went off to find my class. mensa 2 is stupid lehh. or rather, i`m dumb. i didnt notice the second level of mensa 2. they told me they were at mensa 2 and i was like, i am here too, but i didnt see them. hohos. and realised there's a second level la... =.=! how stupiid lurh. arghs. aniwae, went off to look for philbert & happen to chance bjorn. we went over to design school canteen slack all the wae from 3-4 can?! it's like, we got so mani stuffs to talk about la.. typical us!

hahhhs. hmmms, and den i went for my lecture at LT17, quite near. thank god i made it in time.. hohos. intro to htm was easy i think. was so geography plus history! I LIKE! heeehs. and den lecture ended after 1 hr! when it's suppose to be 2hrs. she loves us la. hahhhhs. dream on la joanne! xD

headed to xiaoyun's house vacinity as she forgotten her wallet and we peii her walk back. half the class went over first. or rather, 75% of them went off first. den we took a train, activated my ez-link card and den took train to bugis. omg, it's really hilarious with sophia , chelsie, cassan, theresa & xiaoyun. so crappish can. esp. sophia and chelsie. so damn on and zaii la they all! xD headed over to roma deli { which does brought back mani mani memories , really alot.} and we crapped and laughed and played la! ^^ so fun. after that headed to bugis street to cassan dad's shop and started to explore the glasses there. hilarious la. LOL. aniwae, cassan changed her contacts to specs and she went home with her dad whilst the rest went to visit my parent's shop la.. yupp. they left after awhile la. and den i went to work, close shop and now home. typical day of working so i shant elaborate much.

seriously, i am afraid of getting into it. i am afraid of failing again. i am afraid that i am not up to standard and i am afraid i wont get used to it. i dont have the confidence i used to have and i dont have the courage to take this up again. do give me time to think. i really need time. it all came too sudden. and i really don't wish to spoil anithing of now. please, just give me time to think. i aint that prepared for this. sorry ehs.

shall reply tags today !

joserina : okayy, sorry ehs! and i didnt get to see u in school la. inform me about ur breaks. we should have a get together soon la! i miss yoos lehhs. happy?! LOL.

amanda : hohos, yea everything practically getting fat but not me! heeehs. and i know you are honoured first one somemore! happy right? thank me la. heeeeeeeeehs.

hi : hellos, may i know who are yooos? thanks for tagging aniwae.

kaili : i know i know! that's why i creditted yoos lehhs. placed ur name there.mus feel honoured horrs! xD

kwang hui : i know u alwas read my blog but nva comment! hmmphs. lols. honoured ar? i will help u spread ur name and fa yang guang da one! ^^

naemah : you will get a ben 10 from me! no master yoga, ben 10 that playing watch! want? verii cheap . i buy for u.

meihan : hellos! yoos are mei xian or mei han sia? =.= aniwae, thanks for tagging here. i remember i tagged at ur blog already. hohos. i scared i forget check ur reply ma. aniwae, haven seen u for ages . have u changed? grown taller le ma? attached le ma? update me here ar. anitime u miss me or wanna see me can contact me one. hahhhs!

animore silent readerrrs?! PLEASE TAG LA! hahhhhs. look forward to you people taggggingg! i feel like imposing one rule, more den 10 tag a day den i blog for that day. not bad ar?! mus be of different people. lols. no la. i will still blog. but jus tag more people! ^^

byeee! off to bed now. nighhhts!

xoxo



Tuesday, April 22, 2008 @ 2:26 AM



sometimes i would rather choose not to see certain stuff in life , it jus saddens me more- truths.


hello hello! back to postinggg. i promise and ya. here's the post. hmmmms. today was the second day of school. wow, i woke up at 8.30am when school's starting at 9am SHARP. it wasa tutorial of Food and Beverage Fundamentals. like wahh lao, that lecturer go thru slides so fast no time to copy one lo. luckily mrs lee's geography lesson + machine gun like lessons trained me to copy faster. =.=! lucky me! : D lecture ended in 1.5hrs. quite good i think. at least, i understand! i hope i can continue to understand laaaa! heehs. next lesson , i will definitely carry that big and bulky and cannot talk laptop.


after that headed to xiaoyun's house to get her presents for her friend? btw, xiaoyun , sophia, chelsie , theresa and many more unknow names my loyal readers have not came across in my blog, ya, they are my newfound goodie friends! heehhhs.. after that, went back to design school to eat the chicken chop. as i presumed , it was really fantastaiiicccc!super duper ultra niceee! woooooots. promotion feees! lols. wad a money minded person u are joanne! slapp urself! heeehs. ok. ignore my own conversation. after lunch at 11.30am , yes. 11.30AM!


headed to class for common skills tutorial. omg. expository essays again. rambert wee! same boat leh us! u teach me ar! ur forte leh! lols. wish me good luck people. but i am really glad that what the lecturer said was really alot similar to what mdm noreha taught la! i really thank her for making me love english and essays and stuff. ^^ it's like , what she said was similar to what mdm noreha taught beforee! thank god man! hohos. arent i a fortunated kid? i think so toooo! heeehs. bought this book at $8.20, and collected my lecture notes which cost $4.50 . heavy la. imagine me carrying laptop for F&B lectures. #$^#%^! went home after tutorial.


heeeeeeehs. it's so great being home la. played with my dog. and called the compaq company. apparently, i`m having some trouble to use some applications . thus i called for help. guess what? an indian man picked up my call, sorry philbert, but i aint being racist but just stating the truth of it heeehs, and the indian and me, have trouble communicating. seriously man! know what he asked me to do?


first of all maaam' take out ur battery and your adapter. now press the power button .
so i did i pressed. he kept quiet all the way you know whilst i`m pressing. so when i press until i not happy i said,
hello? press finish already anot? verii long you know?

no no maam' , you will have to press and i`ll have to check the time .
{ what time sia, that was wad i was thinking la....}
so i questioned him, errr, you can check my computer from your place?!
he said no, and asked me to continue pressing, so i was being real idiot to press trying to switch on something without any power. =.=! ya.
and he asked me to release my hand. i said yes i released already. and he asked,
so have u finish releasing your hand.
it's like WT...BBQ...TMD...RELEASE ONE STUPID BUTTON TAKE HOW LONGG?!!!! omg, i kept laughhhing. and i replied
ya, releasing my hand off the button don't require much time.....
and the conversaion goes with alot of laughter here and there. lols!


it's real hilarious i tell you! but at least my problem is addressed lurhhh.. ^^

hmmms, and den and den, ya, i saved the post till the above line and went to watch AH WANG . heeehs. innocences is so good la. at least, he's not prone to all those hurtful stuffs. envy envy. *smaccckks* back to reality la. i realise i do post and type and type alot. plus the font is small, my posts are so long. omg. sometimes i really find myself having nothing to say but... it saes the otherwise! hohos. now i am back from buying my mexico chicken wing. it better be nice. cus my honey chicken wing ran out. btw, it's jus some bites from 7-11 la. ^^ yuppps. and i have finished doing my tutorial homework for F&B and now gonna do my tutorial homework for intro . to HTM. alot of work la. omgggg.. aniwae, i shall go off to watch more shows to entertain myself now. tml gonna go to bugis with 1H05! YAYS! and friday will be orientation for HTM double yays! heeehs. and ya. gonna spend my day fullest no more emo joanne! i hope.

heeehs. bye bye!

philbert ! mus be happy hor! i verii happy le leh. nva emo liao . heeehs.


xoxo



Monday, April 21, 2008 @ 10:58 AM



hello guys, jus finished editting my skin. credits to that person whom made the skin la. i jus editted my own stuffs here and dere. not much. yupps. first day of school was a blast! so much fun. hohos.
1H05 gonna have a outing this wednesday at bugis shaw tower ROMA DELI. although it brings back memories, but yea. roma deli is a nice place to dine. although it is a vegetarian restaurant, it is seriously nice la! reconmanded by me!go try it out. food lover, why not go and try? ^^ i`ll book the place tml i guess. yupps. HAVE TO BOOK.

yupps. and our lecture for today was interesting la. at least, i understand the topic. a great start for me! i believe that i am able to do well since i competed with the rest of singapore during O levels. and ya. this time if i was to work harder again, i will acheive my goals. plan, organise, lead, control. heeeehs. lecture ended in 1hr instead of 2 hrs. lols. yupp, was released at 3? and i slacked with the class till 4.30pm.

went over to design school's canteen to have my lunch - i think , with xiao yun, theresa and her friend, melody. was fun eating dere. it's real cheap la! for a big plate of pork chop ( since chicken chop ran out of stock ) it only cost $2.60 with frieds which is super duper nice. theresa agreed too! yuups . and den at around 5 i headed to the mushroom to meet amanda and mei yi. they are evaxing. and ya.

waited for philbert to end his lesson. instead, li yong came first thus we waited for philbert. then waited for rambert , saw edmond asked him to come along. and off we go to kfc for dinner. it is alwas fun to dine with them la! so much laughter and fun can?! hard to find friends like i have in 4e2. hahhhhs. not saying the rest not good, but they are a special bunch of people la! to me -at least. hahhs. slacked all the way from 6 to 8. and den we changed our venue . finish eating kfc, we went to mac to eat! hahhhhhhhhhhs. wad great eaters we are! hohos. and went home at around 8.30pm. that's how my day ended. we are planning a movie outing this thursday. yay!

so tml i`ll be heading to the west to tutor a friend of mine.
wednesday i`ll be out with 1H05 .
thursday i`ll be meeting them for movie .
friday i have HTM orientation .
saturday and sunday will be work i guess. ^^

wow! my week is so packed and fun la. lucky i have no tutorial this week. more time to spend.
yays. hohos. and ya, so far school's still verii verii fun! thank god that i have these bunch of people surrounding me. ^^

something random, i didnt regret going to east spring la. i even am praising east spring now and den. i think, east spring isnt that bad after all. cus seriously, primary school, i wasnt a girl who is strong, lead, motivates, smart, bold, independent, initiative. east spring made me who i am today, not forgetting those i listed at the right! * you guys are loved la!

okay i gotta go already. tml's lecture starts at 9 and here i am blogging. omg. 5 more hours of sleep. joanne you are dead!

i gotta go already guys! takkaire . i shall blog tommorrow. this make over of blog gives me mood to blog once again. heehs. check for updates!

byeee!

shall reply tags tml! sorry ah!

xoxo



Friday, April 18, 2008 @ 9:12 AM


2 days of orientation at TP really tire me out to the core man. but it's glad tat i still can make it to some outing with ... i shall address later.

TP orientation yesterday start out with registration which was not really verii fun to attend. and it was some learning of mass dance, business cheer, hand sign song, tp song... first day i dont really remember? just tat i`m in class 1 H05. good or bad, it still needs time to know! hope it will bond well lurh.

today, orientation was suppose to start at 8am. i woke up at 8.am instead. wow! lucky i stay near TP! hoohoos. it's my turn now eh! envy envy! heeeehs. anwae prepared and walked to school.
Reached at around 8.28am?! wa, not bad! l
ols. after that went over to auditorium 2 to get changed into my yellow banana shirt. business school shirt! YAY! met my class, hmmms, not really enthu yet. morning mahhhs! followed by a talk by the CM. ms chooi. she's great. i am glad i didnt have the mood to like fall asleep? duno why. but after what she said, i promise myself and set a goal already. shall not mention.. my own personal goals. heehs.
after tat headed to have "tea break" buffet like? lols. wow. not bad.
hmmms, followed by meeting of our care person MR THIRU. wow. lols. he's lameeee. =.=! but glad tat he did made us laugh somehow or rather? oh yea, i gotta know my class alot more today! den den den, matrix card was given, timetable out. omg. shitty. so packed. 7 subs to learn next week. jiayou mann! goshhh.
hmmms den den, we went over to the sports complexfor oylumpiad? . business won. i dunno why too. hohos. was a fierce fight lo . kept screaming. and cheering. business rocks! lols. no more energy till now le. shall stop highing. and business won lurh. went for reegata, business top also. and business won overall. yupps. verii happi lo. ^^

after that went to find philbert, rambert, joel, marcus lee , xiu hui [ she found me ] and we went to KFC to have our dinner. it's alwas so enjoyable and fun with them lo. ^^ we were comparing timetable and thanks la! accounts monday no school, info friday no school, BSG, they first week no tutorial. and me in HTM, HAVE TO ATTEND ALL TUTORIAL AND LECTURES WITH NO FREE DAY EXCEPT THURSDAY OF GOING SCHOOL FOR 2 HOUR TUTORIAL. lols. sound like a big fuss made. but actually okay la. at least no need slack.crapped and crapped as usual. talk nonsense. made xiu hui laughed non stop. me too lurh. it's alwas this happy with them. heeehs. den we all decided to go for jam and hop(like clubbing , but school kind) although we like "alot dun wan go wan go home tat kind". wa damn high . saw audrey. she's damn high la, danced and danced, with xiao yun and rachel too. xiu hui also high high but not high enough. den marcus dey all decided to leave den i left with them. heeehs. we were like singing IT school the cheers la. thanks to philbert that banana. kept singing. omg. all the way from TP, walk to safra. xiu hui left whilst we continue to make our way to safra. so funny la, me escorted by 4 guys. heehs. honoured! hohos. den, we went to safra to play pool . heeehs, not bad ar! score 3 at the time leh! BANANA dun laugh at me for giving 3 freee ball. and marcus, i wan my medical fees. xD joel! dun look down on me le la! xD rambert was quiet . he claims tat i`m being noisy tat's why i felt that way. typical rambert. LOL. oh ya! we saw si hao, peng xiang, joey and yi wei at safra pool too! we were jus next tables nia. so coincidence! den we played together lo. philbert keep disturbing me and he calls me a ba long long now! LOL. and i played la. so darn fun playing with them. it's funny i meant. ^^ den i left at 10.30pm. walked home...

seriously it's really a blessing to know this bunch of guys - joel, rambert, philbert, kok boon , plus marcus lee. hmmms, mainly the first four of them. they are like my elder brothers like tat. alwas take care of me one. ya, we alwas crap and they play and joke with me. most of the time the joke's on me. but i noe they still dote me alot de hor! dey dun dare to bully me to a extend la. i mean, jus play kind. verii good and nice cliques. ^^ philbert! MY LUNCH BREAKS HOR! heeehs. still , they are the " kar ki-s" i name. they are still the ones whom will be there for me eventually. not all the time, not to help me. but their actions, speech do make ones laugh. ^^

i dedicated to you all hor. happy right? ^^

k , i`m really tired but i still made the extra effort to post this. cus, gawd knows when i will post next. hmmms, okay i think .. i thinkk tml.. ya. should be lurh. hope so. heeehs.

P.S : my hamsters are growing verii fat! ^^

tags reply next time.

xoxo



Monday, April 14, 2008 @ 5:33 AM


hello all. been missing all day longg.. as wanted by joserina-the reasons for not going for camp. i did not went to the FOC camp due to the ineffieciency of some people. shall not bother animore. yupp. as said, there was a lack of space? yea. but, i have nothing to say.

well, den on the 10th after walking out of TP, i went over to tampines west mac to slack all day. went to play badminton. LOL. been such a long time since i played. but i guess, it's still okay. i can still hone my skills . yupps. went home after dat.slacked and rest. err. and dat's how my 10th of april end.

11th, er, did nothing.. amanda came over to my house and slackedd? yea. and err..tat thursday.. hmmms. stayed home and chionged huan zhu ge ge 2. i know mani will ask. why watch a show dat's like ages ago. er, i like it, and i re watched it. for no particular reasons. and i enjoy watching it. slept at only 5.30am? hohos. someone was so mad at me! heeeh. sorry nahhs.

12th, which is a friday, i went to work at around 5pm? after watching my show again. hohos. and denn, went to work. sometimes, i really dont enjoy working and being reprimanded for things tat i aint responsible for. aniwae, been seeing guys wearing skinny jeans of 2 colours. how ridiculous is this? and next i will see guys wearing hot pants, mini skirts? tube tops and sphag. tops?! omg. i carn imagine man. *close eyes* sighs. wad's wrong with the world? will it kill to stay normal?! =.=!

13th i went to work as usual of cus. hohos. and errr, worked till i fell sick. hohos. no la. at night, wanting to chiong my huan zhu ge ge 2 till it ends, i was hungry in between, thus, i made a cup of milo containing 3 spoons full of milo powder those table spoons one, and drank it with 5 pieces of jacob biscuits. hohos.

currently i`m down with fever and worse still, biz orientation is coming in jus a few days time whilst school is starting jus next week? i hope my timetable is flexible enough for me to not miss my work. mani ask, why work so much ? do i desperately need money? nope. i dont need the money, but i wish to gain experience and friends of other circles...

feeling so darnn sickk lurh. idiotic flu + fever + everywhere pain + headache. when will all these go away ar? i aint doing my part to rest, to recuperate! heeeehs. aniwae, sorry for posting from last night to this morning. my laptop shut down. but luckily blogger do auto save. i went off to watch tv, came back com off already so i went to sleep. heeehs. yupps. today, is the 15th of april. wow, school's starting soon man.

TP are such cheaters tat they only give us our timetable only if we went for orientation. so scheming. =.=! i hope that the orientation will be at least a bit enjoying. if not, i`ll change my opinion man. yupps. i wanna get my timetable soon urh. so tat i can plan my work and jobs together. omg. so anticipatingggg. 2 more days of rotting.heeehs. alright then, i think the way i blog, might be too tiring for readers.. not humourous but jus daily routine life of mine.hahhhs!

byeeee!

TAGS REPLY :

joserina : girl! sorry for not making it wor. i was down with fever. so utterly sorry!

jonathan : LOLS! you in love with show luo zhi xiang? i shall change the song. shall not let u indulge in this happiness. heeehs.

edwyna : yalo, yoos both ar... control cann?! i noe u guys are desperately loving show luo. but control control. perhaps i should change the song already. hohos.

amanda : lols! HELLO! WELCOME BACK FROM CAMP!

naemah : i noe wad songg! OPEN ARMS! i noe i noe.. i noe u love me to this extend. dun worry i will let uu welcome me with open arms. i noe u miss me greatly nai nai. ^^

i should change my blog skins sooon..

BYE!

xoxo



Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 11:42 AM



just a short post before i go for my camp tml. which starts at 12pm. meeting the girls at 11am. i hope. and er, packed my stuffs already. still lacking of my nike water bottle which will be heavy..
and wad to wear for tml, plus, my cash how much . shags. i going down to work after camp which the camp itself is ending at 8pm. !^$%^$@# chilli. heehs. aniwae, thanks to gwen i`m able to sell my first 2 goodybooks. did i say i am having quite alot of jobs currently ? or going into? meaning i have increasing incomes! heeehs. my mum is hoping that i open a blog shop on my own. and now i`m also selling goodybook books.. and working at bugis . and next is giving tuition to some of my relatives or rather, juniors. well, yea. gonna be busy and real busy. ever since the holiday started. i have not stop working. freaky eh? i did lurh. when i went overseas and for 4e2 class chalet. well well well.. just finished packing and finalising my bagpack. [ it aint good to d last min work. ] yup. ready to set off for tml's camp!
bugis cliques! dun miss me ar! hohos. alright, nights people. i hope i will have a happier blog from today onwards. i promise. like wad edwyna said in her blog it does make sense.. we only live once, so why live unhappily?! yuppps. heeehs.
wont be blogging till sat night dun miss me people !
tags reply :
joserina : thanks girl! i`m happier already. teeheees. yoos come find me lurh! sms me first. u got my no. right?
edwyna : lols! so creative urh. bu kui shi wo zu zhi duo mo , you chong man you mo gan, yi ji, auntie jing shen de ah bu! hohos.
byeee~!

xoxo



Tuesday, April 8, 2008 @ 11:07 PM



alright, shall have a happier post for today! nyeahahaha ~okkay. recently, i`ve been with a chio collegue of mine. she's younger den me. but she's really prettyee! she taught me alot. yea, she smokes and she is from some sort of gang. thus, i told her my life . she told me her life. i told her to go study again. and she's seriously thinking of that. yupp. i`m glad she's listening. hohos. aniwae, was talking to edwyna about how we will snatch stuffs at shengshiong supermarket. hohos. i wanna blog till old la. edwyna! you better blog till you are 90! hohos. and post more retarded photos like those! without ur teeth and a head of white hairs. or bald. yupp! tat's real funnny. heeehs.
alright i shall go off first. a short post only. shall post more later! i promise. byee!

xoxo



@ 9:22 AM


i tried to do my best already. i know tat after they left. everything will be down onto me. i didnt shirk ani responsibilities. yes. there are new people. but i wouldnt know how to ask them to help me do it. they are so much older den me. so mani stuffs happening at a time.. yet you guys chose not to understand but added on to everything. i`m jus a part-time worker. you expect me to come down every single day after school days. hello. i will be tired out. yes. i dont mind. but i jus need a break. my appendix was acting. and i wasnt able to do much. yet you blamed me for not packing the stuffs. for goodness sake, spare me some time can? to even rest. can? you wouldnt want me to talk to others. but you know me well. and you know tat i am someone over-hyper. i dont understand why u want to keep me to the lil shop and forcing me to do this and dat. i need my life. i know your business situation. and i know wad might happen. why carn you guys be more optimistic. i`m tired of being dragged into every single matter. i`m tired of being blamed for the simplest thing. i just hope to... get a breather. why carn you even give me dat. i did not rebel against you on anithing. be it me sleeping for 3 hours only, i still came down to help you out. i`m tired. i did not have enough rest. yes. you will blame me for not wanting my own rest. but i have to go out to settle on some personal stuffs. i know it took up time and i know you wouldnt like it. who can i even talk to. who can i even trust? i stayed in that shop and i dun even take offs often jus to help you guys out. becus of this, i carn really meet up my friends. alwas there's other people taking off. i have to be down. everyday there's others taking off thus i`ll alwas end up not able to come down late/not coming. i did not complain. i did not. now.. the older collegues i have all left me already. they are people whom i confide to. and just becus i confide in them, you got jealous and didnt like them. you even question the wae i treat them and the wae i treat you. that's two total issuees. how stressed up i feel now. and i carn tell ani new collegues. they are all not gonna listen to me. i talk to some other people. cus at least they know me longer. and i can confide to , hopefully. but who know tat you even wanted me to coop myself in that small lil shop. now my job aint tat simple . not basic - serving customers, hanging clothes, putting back to original place. now my job is so complex - pack goods, check stock missing, remember goods in the warehouse, on top and at the next shop, serve, hang, tell new collegues prices, find the goods. how stress up i feel?

and i went to find him. hoping to ask him how is he and hope tat he will unblock me off his msn. i really dunno wad i did wrong tat you have to avoid me in all waes.. i jus hope tat after each r. friends is still a choice. but no. this frightens me. i wont dare to enter r. as it alwas end up with no more friendship. i just wanted to care more about u. is tat so tough? i jus wanted to know more about u . are u so reluctant? am i so detestable. this really lower my self - esteem. i didnt know tat i am so influencial that you have to block me off your vision/thoughts/hearing. i really dunno wad's wrong.. so confused. i jus seek for your answer. is it really so tough to give me an answer. i woke up early hoping to catch by you. but yoos went out ahead of my arrival. disappointed but wad can i do? i left a note. but ended up being chilled by you. i dunno wad's wrong already. haiis. can someone show me my path?

i know you do treat me very important and well. but sometimes, i do have some other todds. am i really the only one ? you have your school . and i am starting school soon. no matter wad u promised me, i carn bring myself to believe. i dun wish to be left hopeless again i dont wish to be hurt and betrayed once again. i just wanted you to assure me, and tell me wad i want to hear.. haiis. doubt u will ever read this. cus i noe yoos too well.

friends are there. i know. but somehow, i still carn bring myself to tell every single one of you out there wad's really wrong with me. these are all those on the surface. i aint tat happy at all. i aint tat strong. i am...


throughly drained out.

forcing myself to wear a smile, forcing myself to do mani stuffs to numb myself. wasnt the solution. troubles and stress still comes. was telling my another collegue today, dont tempt me to S. intentions of tat did came. and i was so closed to tat. i dropped that todd. i dunno wad causes me to change so much. maybe, i jus wanna build a wall around me. to avoid being hurt once again..

whether ani of you believe or not..jus gonna say, i`m truely, deeply afraid. to lose my loved one. to get hurt again. i aint tat strong. i`ve hid my emotions. nor did i showed my feelings out. except tat fateful night. i still remember how i embraced in her arms. i miss her. they aint here to encourage me .. they have left. my sisters, my elder advisors.. they have taught me alot.. alot than a 17 year old girl should know. it's all defensive skills tat i should learn and slowly, use it. i miss the times we 3 crapped together in the shop. i know. it's best for you guys to leave. than to bear with it. i wish you guys luck.

阿芬姐姐毛毛, 我很想念你们!我不知道还能向谁倾诉。我只知道,你们是我唯一会把一切告诉你们的人!我不知道如何感激你们这几个月的教导,以及一起度过的一切风风雨雨,我只能说,谢谢你们!向我亲姐姐一般的照顾我,疼我。 我还记得毛毛说过一句话。“你还有我们啊!”谢谢你!我好像好想你们哦!一定要联络我好吗?你们从不怀疑我,也没有停止照顾我。 现在,腰酸背痛,也没有毛毛帮我擦药了。难过与不明白一些事的时候,没有阿芬姐姐叫我怎么做了!谢谢你们所教会我的!我会牢牢记住。昌起歌时要想起我哦!

笨头笨脑的小女孩 [阿芬姐姐,我承认了]
白2 [毛毛,我也承认了哦!]

the above chinese paragraph was dedicated to two people very precious to me. i miss them alot. i seriously do. no one have ever trusted me and dote me like thei own sister so dearly. they really give in to me. let me play. play with me. let me slack. when i am tired they ask me rest they work . i leg pain they help me to massage. shirt loose, they help me sew tighter, hungry they buy food with me, sad they share with me their experience, shared our happiness together.... i miss them. i seriously do. 姐姐,你们有空要回来找我!我好想你们!i`m glad to know them. i really am glad.

shall end my post with a happier note , my hamsters gave birth again and i have 2 more income route opened for myself. i will not forget what my wad my two sisters say before they left. i wont forget.. i will take care no worries people. i will. and i wont give up trying...

btw, my handphone broke down 1 week ago. and it's in sony servicing centre.
nothing much to complain since they changing everything for me... and i got a nice spare phone for myself. gastric problem is coming too often. but i carn change my eating habit. i miss alot of people now.. ah fen jie jie, mao mao, alwin, yvonne, jacquelinee... bugis cliques. i miss them... alot. haiiis..

i`m getting hungry already after all those crying in the above paragraphs.

shall reply tags for now ....

marinne , thanks girl.

amanda , =.= thanks eh? updated.

naemah, you will console me and embrace me with your open arms right? i`ll wait for u at bugis den.

jonathan , thankyou. why dont u use it as ur blog song den?

tiffany , hello girl. i am doing fine i guess. aniwae, i miss u urh. do meet up soon. we shall go shopping.

tags replied. bye.

xoxo




profile

I`m simply a girl with the name of Joanne Tan. I am a child of God, and I simply love God with the bottom of my heart. I`m turning 18 soon in oct-7-2009. I realise alot more when I come to recognise his voice. The voice of truth, courage and love. My life took a turn on the 17th of May 2008.with the addition of joy through my loving CG & unit. That's when i realise that there's so much more to life, than the life that I we have been living. Have you found the life purpose that will last till you die?


I've found mine, what about you?

Goals-

- Grow myself to a CL.
- See people's life transformation.
- To lift Jesus's name on High.
speak out! -