Saturday, April 26, 2008 @ 9:52 AM

control control control .. *breatthe * relax....

ok.

went to kwang's house to help him install microsoft office into his com.i woke up early becus of you eh. hmmms, denn went over to tmall to get some stuffs. after that headed to amanda's house to wait for her. decided not to go down to novena HQ to report . next week den. we headed to eastpoint to shop. had a great talk with her in the bus. long time since we talked so much. denn, after she left, i met philbert, boon, joel at east point. fun to see them still so playful and stuffs. headed down to bugis after that. nothing much. work nothing much to sae i think.

ok. this comes the part to tell you guys why i have to breathe in to relax before i post for toay. i promise that i wont have any more sad post, but sorry, i today really really really have to get this off my chest...

seriously, i realise i really am still bothered with your actions, whether you still acknowledge my presence and all those... yoos know, i really do still think of you. it isnt easy to forget you. yes, it may be hurtful, but i still tried to contact u and stuffs. still, you are still avoiding me, acting ignorant. you know how deeply you hurt me? you may not bother, you may not care. i believe, i still stand a place in your heart. if not you wont purposely do all those just to avoid thinking back. how silly my mind was to dream of you last night. i don't know. it was such a great dream. but i know, it will nva come true. how much i wanna talk to you to tell you stuffs to clear things up. the chance was never given. it hurts to know you REALLY tried all waes to avoid me. i`m really tired of contacting u again and again and again. it may be irritating to you, but still, i tried my best. i tried. it's saddening to know this is the ending of what i call... love.. why carn friendship still stays after a relationship ends? i dunno wad's wrong with me.. i really dunno. i tried . i really tried. i`m tired. really tired of loving in the past. and i noe it's tiring to love someone, so i dun wish that you love too much.cus i dun have the confidence at all. i dun have.i`m afraid to hurt u. afraid to step into this afraid to end all this with the above ending. i`m really afraid. who knows how i feel aand who can i spill the whole thing out to? who can i sought? haiis.

helpless.

sorry for the above post. sorry. utterly sorry. i`ll reply tags tml. sorry.

xoxo