Tuesday, January 20, 2009 @ 4:19 AM


I have a great burden for my family now..

My maid is going back home already. her Dad is having some critical situation recently. Heard from her she didnt wanted to leave, she even want to study in Singapore.. But this have to happen. I feel so lost for her. She cant bear to go back, as she's already part of our family. we didnt bear for her to leave too. My sister cried, my dad also cried. Well, not that we're crazy or what, but she's really a very very nice girl. I have never regarded her as my maid, but as my sister. As my close family one. I see the way my family feels towards her departure, Indeed, a surge of sadness overwhelmed me. I dunno why, but I really cant bear to let her go. Realised how she've been doing many jobs that we do not know how to do if she's leaving. Who's going to bring my sister to school- my sis want my dad to drive her now. ( my dad is already v. tired out) who's going to help my dad makes the food for sale whilst my dad goes for work? who's going to help my dad pay for his bill? who's going to help my dad to run errand? which maid will understand my grandma? who will be able to take care of my dog well. I can bath the dog, but diamond's reliance on my maid is way too close. diamond wont sleep, till she sees my maid. that's how close she's with my maid. haix.

She became a christian after she joined our family to work. She also converted her parents through her strong and persistent faith. How great is our God. even moving till this extend. No one can denies the power of God that's working amongst people's heart.

Recently I noticed how my Dad is staring into space without reacting to the situation. He would not smile , he would just frown, he would just get worried. I see his haggard and tired face, I realised my Dad aged. I havent been realising, how much my dad have worked and pushed himself to get up and chiong the whole day just for the whole family. I really want to do my part. but, no matter how much I do, my dad just wont stop working for a single day. he's not even smiling now. I know there's a problem in him. I know he have a heart issue, heart knot that he wont want to reveal. Right now, seeing him crying becus of my maid's departure, it greatly affected him much more. Without my families realisation, my auntie-my maid, have slowly been doing half of what my dad suppose to do. She's been a great helper of my dad, be it in my dad's business, or in our house, she'll really take care of it. she always do her best, and never allow her emotions to affect her in any way. My dad, is been hit with this fact. no matter how much my dad wanna stay her, my maid wouldnt, her family is quite in a drait state. it made me realise how much i wanna help in this family. i feel so so so burdened, i know my dad is freddiing over money issue, family issue and all issues. but yet, i do not know how to help him other than to do my part. I want to do beyond my part, but I dont know how. I want to see joy in my family, i want to see happiness in my family, but so many issues are coming up, it seems so impossible to have events to get together. chinese new year is coming, but yet, this first day of lunar new year, my mum wants to do business, this means my dad , my mum wont be able to spend the new year with me. Yes, money is important, but to me, I believe God will bless. my dad do not want to start the business, but my mum insisted. What can we say and what can we do.

Looking at my grandma, she's aged 88 now, she've reduced the no. of times she go to the market from 3-2-1 now.. she's not as strong as before. she's not as energetic as before. she's weaker, she's tired, she's old already. Seeing at these situation, i really feel lost, feel i dunno where to start from..

Father,
I desperately pray for protection over my family, over every single situation that might be happening. Take control, let your power reign. I want to pray that my maid's dad will recover upon your healing powers so that she'll be able to pursue her interest, her love in studying. I would want to pray for my dad lord, Lord, let my dad realise, money is not all that matter, yes, we need them, we cannot live without it, but you've said, even those birds in the sky are fed by You, are we not as important as they? God, I know you're looking, I know you're in control. I want to pray for Joy in my family Lord... my mum is not a christian, I pray for her conversion Lord.. my dad have left you for a long time, and is lost in the world now, Lord, pick him up, bring him back into your embrance Lord! I pray for my grandma that God you'll strengthen her as she goes and to complete much more of your work in her whole lifetime Lord. she's a faithful servant of yours, she've done her very part to see her whole family, her sons, daughters, grandchildrens being baptized in the name of Jesus christ Lord. Your power and your awesomeness have been witness in her whole life. Continue to help her and strengthen her Lord, let her health be a great testimony to the world Lord! I pray for my brother's and sister's salvation too Lord, they've lost their way in christ once again, Lord, select them, choose them. For God, I believe you'll continue to search for them and seek for them till they come back to you Lord. I will do my part, and let your will be done. God I pray for all, take charge and use me Lord.

Amen.

xoxo

profile

I`m simply a girl with the name of Joanne Tan. I am a child of God, and I simply love God with the bottom of my heart. I`m turning 18 soon in oct-7-2009. I realise alot more when I come to recognise his voice. The voice of truth, courage and love. My life took a turn on the 17th of May 2008.with the addition of joy through my loving CG & unit. That's when i realise that there's so much more to life, than the life that I we have been living. Have you found the life purpose that will last till you die?


I've found mine, what about you?

Goals-

- Grow myself to a CL.
- See people's life transformation.
- To lift Jesus's name on High.
speak out! -